The Woman Who Reads

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There has passed some days without to post so much on this platforms. The reason has not been other that everybody has the right of holidays and to rest, even if one is paid or not. However, it seems appropriate to come back remembering a reality: that there is not gender equality in this world.

I know some people asks themselves about all this work which I am doing, maybe some of the people know my CV too and, probably, some of you could keep wondering why I cannot make any income with my work. Well, I am going to tell you. Leaving aside the fact not all the countries have the same sort of laws in matters of to open business than others and that it is not easy for an alien to open a self-employment in other countries with better opportunities; which, in resume, I call bureaucracy issues. There is another bigger issue which is the rejection that people has in the industry to women. I am not talking for to talk. It is a real issue about so many people have talked about. In fact, you can read more accurate numbers, real examples with people you know… Here on this Forbes piece.

However, my problem is not so “simple” like the one Jennifer Lawrence or Meryl Streep have, for to put an example. No, it is not about that. Do you know that song called Woman Is The Nigger Of The World by John Lennon? That was totally right and never ever better expressed. Listen it here, if you want to.

The reality started when I was at college. I knew I wanted to make filmmaking but it seemed people around me was only interested in to work for the public television making all sort of content. So, apart of all the “work” we had at college inside the study program, I decided to give it a try to that working format. The first surprise I had is that I opted for to be editor assistant; arrived the moment they confessed me they had got me for my good looking and that they did not thought I could made that so they decided to put me like producer assistant. I said: “If it is that I am going to do I quit the job”. Why? Because producer assistant here means runner in USA, just for to make you understand, and what I wanted was to play with cameras, the edition… So we arrived to a deal. I was going to be director assistant too. And the truth is none of those “charges” were accurate because, as I have said, people outside this country sees the world quite different.

In short version, the producer -a woman- only needed me not for to help her on her work if not for to have someone to give orders. Just like it sounds. She gave me the musical licenses of the show and I had to fill that paperwork which was delayed since March, it was July and it was done a show at week. Just make the counts for your own. For some reason, it seems she thought I was going to have work enough with that and with other issues for three months and I finished the whole paperwork in a bit less than two weeks. So, technically, there was not more producer work to made for me. I passed hours without to do anything sat on a chair until she had the idea: “Go to the post office to send two letters.” Things like that. I suggested if I could be at the edition room watching and learning but somehow, when I was there for a while with the director and the editor she called at the five minutes saying I needed to go to the post office again… Things like that. One of the directors whom had only four years more than me started to notice that and like I was “director assistant” he suggested he needed help too. And between that, it was less painful to be short. Still, the story in all of this is not about what I did or not. Passing time with the director, I had the opportunity to meet the one whom was filling the position of editor assistant. The one whom had stolen me my vacancy. To my surprise it was the previous producer assistant whom had not filled the musical licenses since March, a boy one year older than me. We were friendly talking and both were agree about the ways that producer had to order the things were quite like a whim. For to make you understand, that girl used to schedule the edition of the content before even it was filmed. Not kidding, she did. So with the rest of the things she made the same. Then this old producer assistant confessed me that I had not to work so much. That way, when she sent him to make this sort of dispatches he used to loose himself on the city: he went shopping, to the cinema… And he put some sort of excuse after. To me everything was clear then: “I did not wanted to work in places like that and which were always leaving everything for the last deadline in a hurry making others work unfairly.”

Although, that was not the only thing. Somehow, they decided to let me go out to filming sessions and it seemed the most shocking for them, that a girl like me could carry heavy tripods, cameras, set them in place and to arrange all the visual protocols requested for to film. That was shocking, that was dangerous, because I did not pretended to waste my time at the cinema on working hours I wanted to work and I did not needed no one for to keep with that work and to develop it. I was prepared for to do it more or less by my own and that, to certain people when they are all men, they do not like it at all.

So, between one thing and other I went to Hollywood. And if it was not enough for a lad for me to have simple representation or a simple job I felt I needed to prove that I was really worthy, that I was not that “beauty” of a picture whom had been hired like production assistant from her good looking and presence, if not I had brains. So what I did? I created a complex television series which I knew I could not make by my own just for the budget it needed. And I started to knock so many doors with all sort of visual pitches like you cannot imagine. And it seems I knocked good doors and I knocked bad ones. Thing which on those times I did not had idea at all because I was only 25 years old and I was trying to get the attention of big people saying: “Hey look! I can make big budget television series too. Would you like to make it or to teach me how can I make those things?” Yeah… I know I have always been a bit naive and advanced for my age. At those ages people uses to be thinking in other stuff, I know.

However, there was the bureaucracy issue, I needed to come back and I said to myself I could look for a job around here in between those things happened or not. But do you want to know what happened? That not all the men in the industry think equal. Even less most of them think in gender equality. Once here, I was rejected by so many males when I sent my CV and textually, some of them whom had been hired for long on the same public television places with a safe wage answered they could not mentor me or to take me under their wing because if they did, in short time I could beat them and probably I would get their job instead of them could keep it. I must say, on those times I was frustrated and upset but that public television closed for the bad economic decisions of those same males. So, they had finished jobless anyway.

Forgetting all the past, but sharing it to make people learn about it. I would like to take this situation with some humour and to share the real cause of why women do not direct more action films in Hollywood. It is not really for the pay gap. We do not have idea of what the “Ba boom” means. It is just that, because the women whom read cannot get simple sound expressions in the same ways that other people does. Enjoy, and remember to keep raising your voice for what you believe.

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